SBS will film the documentary on Tuesday March 23rd and 30th but extremely late, like 1 am -  in the morning.  Time to be confirmed in the guides.

Such an important social issue relegated to the most insignificant viewing time slot!  It tells the audience the importance that SBS places on people having informed choices about something that affects everyone who looks at it.

The initial joy I felt that voluntary euthanasia would be raised again in the minds of the public were dashed and made me feel quite depressed.

The awful awful truth is that I shouldn’t have expected anything more of them.   Death is not a subject Australian people feel comfortable in facing, yet it is inevitable and its timing unpredictable!

Why bother to film the documentary at all? knowing that the elderly sick and frail will mostly be unable to watch it?   The audience themselves who are facing end of life choices!  The politicians certainly won’t be sitting up to watch it and half the people don’t know how to use a video recorder and will have it timed for an earlier show anyhow as they go to bed!!

According to an email received overnight I’m advised SBS is planning to repeat the screening of Do Not Resuscitate, Davor Dirlic’s 2006 Documentary.

It is expected to screen on Tuesdays, March 23rd (Pt 1)  and the second episode on March 30th.  Time to be advised, but one could expect after 8.30 pm…..

I was reminded again of the absolute frustration I felt at having that bottle of Nembutal in my hand, and the great degree of difficulty I had trying to get the bloody top off, only to pour it down the toilet!!  Yes I did actually pour it out and yes, I did not bring any illegal substance back,,,,except a bag of sweets, which I failed to declare (I don’t see lollies as food! and of course, they weren’t for me anyhow)  They had pictures of skulls and my friend collected them, something different, from Mexico’s Day of the Dead!….

I was reminded again of my naivety in thinking or believing that anything I did, could actually make a “State Government” policy difference.    I remembered sitting on the steps of Parliament House and crying like a baby with the stress and distress of the failed Physician Assisted Dying Bill which never got off the ground in spite of all the work that had been done to prepare it for consideration. Liberal and Labor combined to destroy any hope of a regulated system that would provide for choice and dignity in dying!   My distress was no act! but I think I lost something of myself on that day….It was an accumulation of ten years of lobbying….the hard slog, when I was neither young nor fit!    I found myself very weepy for the following week.  My attitude had to change, if I was going to lead a meaningful life outside of worrying about my dying process.

I’ve decided that I will endure a degree of acute pain in the very short term, in order to prevent ongoing suffering, as a end of life choice.   I don’t know yet how, but of course, I’ve  given it hours of consideration.  I’m no hero!, so I want the best end my limited resources can provide for.   With arthritis making its presence felt, my mobility could become a serious problem in the long term, and its these little hiccups that one has to make provision for.

No, I am not promoting suicide, I am merely telling it the way it is for me!   Others can make their own choices.

In Australia it is illegal to use a telephone, fax, email or the internet to discuss or research assisted suicide.  Downloading the handbook, The Peaceful Pill Handbook, carries a $110,000 fine and the Documentary actually picks up on some of my many months of activism in the City of Melbourne, but again ill health prevented me from continuing.   The first rays of a winter sun don’t hit the steps of Parliament House until after 11 am, a long time to stand in freezing weather for a Cause!

Importing Nembutal is also a criminal offence because the drug is a border controlled substance and the maximum penalty for bringing it in is 25 years jail or a $550,000 fine.

I remembered a few year ago reading about a Catholic Priest dealing with the suffering of the terminal ill patients in his Palliative Care Unit and in response to a question about voluntary euthanasia said “Give them tea and sympathy, but nothing stronger!”…. I am terrified that I could end up in a unit with that mentality and a recent Four Corners documentary showed that nothing has changed.

Happily for me at this stage of MY life, the Government really can’t do much about someone like me, criminal that I am!    I don’t have much future left for them to bugger up for me, and having survived a Catholic Convent childhood, nothing they can throw at me in the way of imprisonment is going to have much impact……As long as they don’t mind supplying the prednisolone should we get that far, we’ll have a comfortable arrangement!   I must also ensure I don’t become a burden on the State!

I wish that the media would stop putting those inane little references about help or information about end of life choices, referring people to beyondblue rubbish whenever suicide is mentioned!   The desperately ill are  through the talking! and they want ACTION!.     The majority of people considering death are usually in the queue waiting to die for whatever reason, the majority have no choice about the fact they are looking at death in the face! usually it is a cancer, or a grave medical condition. They’re dying slowly and badly!!!   That the majority of people considering suicide are doing so with good reason from their point of view and their ability to ensure pain with no hope of recovery!    No amount of ‘talking’ will take their pain away!   They’re usually ready to die, because quite frankly the living, is just too bloody hard!  and one has to experience real pain to understand their physic…..nothing to do with being depressed, but I for one,  am certainly not going to jump hoops and pretend I’m happy when I’m hurting! and badly!!

The government should be providing the solution to acknowledge what 88% of Australians want, legislated reform for end of life choices.

February is Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month and the 24th will see Teal Ribbons on sale.  Please support the cause if you can.

A report in Heart & Soul Herald Sun dated 21 February, there was a very good article written by Lollie Barr.

1500 women a year are diagnosed in Australia, of which 850 women will die. That’s one woman every 11 hours.

As statistics have told us before, sadly 75 per cent of women are diagnosed in the advanced stages and will not live beyond five years. It means that women do not live long enough to campaign for better public awareness of the disease - something breast cancer survivors have been remarkable good at. Pink clothes, pink bags, pink food labels, pink balloons, pink fun runs, pink, pink, pink!!

I think I quite shocked Cr Esakoff on seeing her pink ribbon displayed promoting an awareness of breast cancer, by describing it as ‘the yuppie cancer’. I had to explain that silver was the ribbon of choice to promote ovarian cancer awareness and the National Bank were a major sponsor. I’ve actually walked up to a young man in the street and thanked him for his silver ribbon awareness effort.

While the pain and suffering experienced with breast or any other cancer, can never be diminished I would just like more publicity (or at least equal) advertisements, promotions, and Government awareness heightened for cancers like bowel, testicular, ovarian,

Ir’s cruel to think that a child as young as seven, could develop ovarian cancer. Both women’s stories provided in the article were ‘young’, a 46 from Melbourne and a 26 yo from NSW. I was 57 at the time of diagnosis. The younger the women under 60 diagnosed the best chance of a successful cure IF it is caught early enough.

Tests include the CA125 blood test and a trans vaginal ultrasound, but these tests cannot be used to screen for or diagnose ovarian cancer. Diagnosis can only be confirmed following surgery.

Early diagnosis is the critical issue, as is the first stage of the disease, the cancer is contained inside one or both ovaries.

By stage two - it has spread into the fallopian tubes or other pelvic tissues, such as the bladder or the rectum.(that was me) When the cancer has spread outside the pelvic area into the abdominal cavity, then it has reached stage three

The fourth and final stage is reached when the cancer has spread into other organs, such as the liver or lungs.

Interestingly, the article tells readers that taking birth control pills decrease the risk of developing ovarian cancer by up to 50 per cent, especially among women who use them for several years.

The “Risk Factors” are mostly women over 45, never taking a contraceptive pill, few or no pregnancies, high fat diet, overweight and smoking, and a history of cancer in the family, including ovarian, breast and some bowel cancers…. An inherent gene fault accounts for about 10% and occur in one in 500 people in Australia.

Professor Quinn is reported as saying “If a celebrity had the disease (ovarian cancer) then we’d be further ahead in the funding for research at state and federal government level.

February is Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month, so have a conversation with your girlfriends, wives, mothers, sisters and daughters…..Buy a teal ribbon on Wednesday 24th February.

Possible symptoms can include:

back pain
vaginal bleeding
abdominal bloating (major symptom for me)
persistent stomach or pelvic pain
change in bowel habits
weight loss or weight gain (weight loss! assumed balanced diet was working well)
excessive fatigue
needing to rush to the toilet to urinate often and urgently!! (major symptom for me) (hence my nagging for more appropriate toilet facilities within the City of Glen Eira)

My optometrist remarked six months prior, that I had lost significant weight (3 cn) in the face when he checked me for glasses frames, but I still thought it formed part of my busy working life.

I had rheumatoid arthritis (very badly over a three months period) as a nineteen year old, but remained in remission thereafter a year in recovery. At 56 I woke up one morning and both hands were locked up. I thought I would never write another word!!….two diagnosis later by two specialists couldn’t explain the flare up, which normally wouldn’t have occurred once I’d reached 50 year of age…..I believe now it was a warning sign that my blood manufacture was out of whack because of the cancer, which was actually present in my body two years before discovery.

Just to make life interesting, I had two cancers diagnosed at the one time, and my abdomen was described to me as resembling a washing machine full of froth and bubble….Bowels lifted out and the machine was washed out of the cancers along with the bits and pieces…. I’ve been a very very lucky woman!

What lead me to an untimely month’s day in Cabrini was a burst cyst on my ovary which at the times was excruciating painful for a solid couple of hours (Sunday) until it settled to tolerable by the next afternoon (Monday) when I could get a 5 pm appointment. I had only turned to flush the toilet when it burst, but it probably saved my life.

One last symptom I had personally - was an obsessive need to bathe. I would be up at 3, 4 or 5 am in the morning running a bath before work. I would look at my swollen abdomen and think it was ‘getting potty’ in that area - I was so aware of it - and yet never really ‘worried about it!”….Once I was diagnosed, operated on and recovered, I never felt obsessive about the need for a bath. I enjoy the odd bath now, but don’t ‘feel the need’! I genuinely believe it was my sub conscious telling me that I had something bad in my body that needed ‘washing away’…A couple of doctors I tried explaining this phenomenon to, looked at me as it I was stark raving mad!….

The bottom line ladies is that you should always listen to your body - if you don’t think it feels right - get a second or even a third opinion! I had been to a specialist Gynecologist (practicing within Glen Eira) only two months before for a HRT abdominal implant, but unfortunately he failed his duty of care by forgetting to do an internal examination prior to the replacement being inserted!!! Needless to say, he ignored my letter of revelation when I eventually made it home….so ladies, you need to look and be aware of your own body’s messages! Don’t rely on doctors, even “specialists!”……

A study by the University of California showed that four out of 10 women actually spoke to their doctor about their symptoms between four months and a year prior to diagnosis.

Given the odds i can expect to develop cancer elsewhere in my body, and it is anticipated most likely in my bowel, breast or lungs….A year or so ago, I had a Melanoma removed from my back. I am one of those individuals who don’t believe you ’survive’ cancer, it merely goes on the back burner, turned down low….waiting! By the way! I’ve never smoked cigarettes either!

What we do with a time while we’re ‘waiting’ is the important thing about living your life!

Eleven years on, I am living proof that statistics can bypass you and the Russian roulette of life is nothing you can ultimately have any control over.

This sharing of personal information is my contribution to the Ovarian Cancer Awareness Campaign.

In the Age Letters to the Editor, 16th February, 2010.

Right to dignity lost due to the heartless

Lindsay writes:

I am sitting in my sister’s home at a small table in the family room.  It’s uncomfortable, but it gives me a view of my mother’s wasted body lying in the bed.   I can hear her laboured breathing as her organs start to shut down.

Every time there is a pause in her breathing, or a rattling cough, my heart skips.

I struggle to go into the bedroom.  I know I will break down when I see those sunken eyes that have become opaque and unseeing, and the body protrusion mapping a face that was full of life and love a few months ago.   And when I feel the parchment like skin that had previously been soft and so comforting for a son to touch.

My mother was a loving and caring woman, full of integrity.  But thanks to heartless laws and lawmakers, she lost something everyone should have a right to; her dignity.

It happened about two weeks ago, when the cancer finally took hold.  She became bed ridden and unable to tend to herself.   When she asked for help, we’d tell her “We won’t let you suffer”,  My mother wanted to die before she struggled through this disgusting suffering death.

But in Australia, she has no rights.   Someone has made this decision for her, condemning her to a suffering end.

Think upon this, you opinionated people, think of someone you love lying dying with a nappy around them.  Imagine their false teeth slipping from their wasted gums and their lips collapsing.  Picture their face like a living death mask.

Every day you see the person as a living corpse, injected full of morphine to ease the pain, Maxolon to stop the nausea;   Serenase to reduce the anxiety….and all this to foster a ‘comfortable death’.  Well there is no comfort, no dignity and no compassion in this death.

I promised my mother I would not let her suffer but I failed her.  I am a coward and will never be able to forgive myself.  I knew how to do it but could not bring myself to do so.

We urgently need to change the law and legalise euthanasia.

My mother died at 5.07 pm on Thursday.

Lindsay McDougall, Brighton

Footnote:   What a terribly moving letter I found this to be.   If only the Physician Assisted Dying Bill had been referred on the Law Reform, people such as Lindsay and myself would have  hope that genuine compassion for the dying is translated into legislation.

Mary writes:

“So, Nembutal can be misused (the Age 15/2/10) The solution is to change legislation to allow end of life choices and physician assisted dying.   Simple.

Mary Bryan, East Hawthorn

Well, I’ve certainly slowed down this past year with endeavouring to promote choice and dignity in dying.  I am feeling an old lady these days, with arthritis slowing me down physically.   More importantly I suppose is the loss of hope about change occurring in my lifetime.

Whether religious beliefs rears its ugly head and seeks to impose its sanctimonious clap trap on the rest of us, or whether I am plain tired, I don’t know what the future holds in providing choice for the individual.

Repeatedly the neighsayers tell us that introducing legislation that would enable euthanasia to become a legalised relief for chronic and terminal illness is just too fraught with ‘dangers’…..So rather than sit down and work through the issues one by one, the law makers shake their heads and look for easier pools in which to puddle!.

In an Age article Monday, February 15, headed Euthanasia Drug Snares younger Australian…. the author, Julia Medew acknowledges that investigations showed that 11 of 38 cases closed by coroners, the deceased had suffered significant physical illness, deteriorating health or chronic pain prior to death.

The Victorian Institude of Forensic Medicine has found that 51 people across Australia have died from an overdose of Nembutal in the past 10 years!

It’s hardly setting the world on fire at that rate! and yet for importing it to help a loved one die (including yourself) it gets you 25 years jail or a $550,000 fine!

A person doesn’t get jail for committing two or three murders, getting knowingly behind a wheel of a car while intoxicated, and wiping out pedestrians and other drivers and their passengers!!! and yet a woman suffering with breast cannot take the simple step of providing a peaceful death for herself without being treated as a common drug smuggler who kills hundreds with their heroin and crack!!!  Or even an adult child who kills his parents for their assets! Or a son who kills both his parents and sister because he couldn’t use the family car!

Eight deaths showed that Nembutal was imported from overseas, but for 28 no source was established.

Fifteen deaths, the person involved worked for a veterinary clinic so it was assumed the drug came from there.

Some figures provided were six in their 20’s, eight in their 30’s, five 40’s, 14 50’s, 3 60’s, 10 in their 70’s, 3 80’s, and two in their 90’s.     AND SO WHAT!   Good luck to their successful journey to relieve their suffering permanently.  I don’t promote suicide, but I certainly understand its a good method of controlling one’s final barrier to excessive pain and suffering.

There is $110,000 fine for downloading Phillip Nitschke’s “Peaceful Pill Handbook” which basically needs a science degree to be useful, or at the best, a kindly doctor!  Both of which are in short supply on the ground! Fortunately no one has been charged with such an horrendous precursor to seeking tools for a peaceful death.

Most of people who Customs ‘catch’ are only bringing in their own supply.  People who invariably are suffering with cancers of which one in three of us will endure.  Watching the TV shows Customs, many people are caught bringing in kilos of death inducing drugs to MAKE MONEY and PROFIT.  Wereas mostly the frail elderly want a single dose for a single opportunity to end the suffering.

Last week we watched a TV program about four dying people in a Palliative Care Catholic Hospice.  Did anyone else watching the show hear the nurse say, we couldn’t give any more pain killers so it got to a level where the pain had to be tolerated!!!!   Why?  Why can’t people have the dignity to ask for as much pain killer as it takes to eliminate the pain!….

When a person is dying, death is inevitable!  Why prolong the suffering, both for the patient and thier friends and relatives looking on…..

The doctors and nurses talk about ‘compassion’ but limit the evidence of it, to the extent that their patients remain writhing in pain, or unconscious altogether….

It’s a crazy world out there!

Apparently 27 took Nembutal who were simply wanting to end their lives, but I agree with Phillip Nitschke, that while that was unfortunate, the access to correct information was outweighed by the need to care for the vast majority of seriously ill people.   The seriously ill have every bit as much right to expect their needs to be met as the young folk who would commit suicide by any means available to them regardless.

Nembutal surely beats ‘hanging’ oneself in the garage for mum to come home and find, with tongue lolling, face puce and eyes bulging… I know of one case where it took the mother a whole year of her life to recover such a horror!!    .How many kids fail to tie the rope properly and die a lingering death because of that??

I suppose by now organisations such as Lifeline and Beyond Blue have realised that society requires more than just another lot of telephone numbers to ring, when people ring talking of depression.  Practical steps need practical help - perhaps a real person, rather than a voice on the other end of the phone, which really doesn’t give a damn about your needs as a person!

Ah yes!  Nembutal isn’t all bad!

Hi Mary

You may remember that I emailed you last fall about healthcare-associated infections. I hope you don’t mind that I’m reaching out again because this is such an important - and preventable! - problem.

Recognizing the rapid growth in cases of hospital-related infections like MRSA and ventilator-associated pneumonia (VAP), we put together a website called “Not on My Watch” at www.haiwatch.com to educate patients and healthcare professionals. Their goal is to eliminate these preventable illnesses and their often tragic consequences.

Reaching more people with this important information means fewer people having to endure avoidable infection and suffering. I’ve created a micro-site that covers everything you need to blog about this on Your Choice In Dying:

http://haiwatchnews.com

Please let me know if you have any questions. If you are able to post or tweet about this, I’d really appreciate it if you’d send me the link.

Thanks for your time,

Barbara

–

Barbara Dunn

barbara@haiwatchnews.com

www.haiwatch.com

Please do not assume that the 100 mil bottle of Nembutal, also known as  Anestesal, Sedal-Vet. Pentobarbital, Sedalphorte, sedalpharma,  Barbithal and various other names but a barbiturate, nonetheless -   so carefully preserved from Mexico will actually work to terminate your pain.  Some times it will, but on occasion it fails!

Just thinking out loud, but take no notice of my thoughts expressed in case I upset the “wrong’” people who cannot comprehend the meaning of the word ‘voluntary’ .  Least of all, the right for me to do with my own body what I see fit for my own wellbeing and peace of mind….thinking out loud….

Don’t be generous, giving that 2nd bottle to your best friend!  Be very selfish and take out insurance by keeping the lot for yourself.

There is documented evidence that the drug, while helping you to sleep extremely soundly 100 mil may not in fact, kill you.

Depending on the level of medical care you’re given. you may ‘wake’ in a vegetative state or you may wake and be reasonably normal after such an ordeal.  Mostly, Nembutal should result in death according to the good books, but you can’t believe everything you read……

Just don’t vote Tony Abbott, the  Liberal Opposition Leader,  in as the next Prime Minister of Australia if you want any hope at all of having a hastened death legislated for,  because of a chronic or terminal illness making your life hell here on earth.    And for heaven’s sake make sure Bronwyn Bishop doesn’t get reelected, because she simply doesn’t understand that not all elderly people share her heroic ideals about the ageing process.  We thought the conservative right had left town to some extent at least at weekends, only to find the right to die belief systems ground almost into oblivion by our politicians……Kevin Andrews?  ugh!!!!

Separating the values of the State from that of the Christian Churches is bloody hard when the religiously inclined  politicians themselves see their duty as putting the dubious and unsubstantiated bible teachings ahead of their responsibility to protect the interests of their constituents.

From: Your Choice In Dying [mailto:choice@yourchoiceindying.com]
Sent: Friday, 27 November 2009 11:07 AM
To: letters@theage.com.au
Subject: “Caring” can mean ‘allowing death to occur”
The ultimate respect Governments can give their Seniors is to enable them to participate in the decision making process dealing with their own end of life.   All the sweet talk about their decades of contribution to society, while fit and healthy, is meaningless unless it is followed by common sense, once aged.   Dying is a natural result of living but it needs to be managed in the most humane way possible in these days death preventing technology.  Those who wish for a hastened death suffering from age related illnesses should be allowed the right to voluntary euthanasia.  I hope all politicians will listen to the 85% of Victorians who have indicated they agree with intervention by Physician Assisted Dying or alternatively providing the right to terminally self medicate.

Mary Walsh

Postscript:  Gawd what a debacle is being played out in Federal Politics this week.  Can the ‘right to die’ lobby have a full comprehension of how far back our cause will be dragged should the man whose mother predicted when he was still a child, he’d either be the Pope or Prime Minister!   Tony Abbott!!  He’ll never be the Pope!  I’d rather that then he would be out of Australia’s hair living in Catholic splendor in Rome… What a weasel of a man, without genuine loyalty or commitment to a cause!   A man who uses the moment to seize the initiative for his own purpose rather than for the common good of Australians.    Bah!!

Of the three contenders today for the Opposition Leader role, the current leader, Malcolm Turnbull is the most honorable and isn’t that the most worthwhile virtue needed in a potential prime minister?    In correspondence, he’s danced around the idea of choice and dignity in dying, so he’s made no problems he hasn’t kept…..

I suppose it is no longer a secret, but I’ve been told that Dr Philip Nitschke and Dr Fiona Stewart have married in a quiet ceremony  in LA a week or so ago.  I wish them a long and happy life together.  I smiled with the knowledge wondering whether she’ll retain her ‘easy’ name of Stewart so she doesn’t spend the rest of her life spelling Nitschke.  Philip already has that drama.

This weeks Public Meeting and then the closed Workshop was the most comprehensive I can remember in some years.  The Workshop was open only to Members, and many were required to become Members on the spot to enable them to stay on.  Also we signed a disclaimer that we would not use any of the information provided to us, which seemed entirely sensible under current legislation.  The law is an ASS!

Dr Nitschke told us with dry humour that he’d had trouble in some parts of the world finding a venue to speak at.   I was quite shocked to learn that in 300 years of debating, Oxford University withdrew its invitation to Philip because other speakers black balled him.   Irving, the Holocaust denier was the only other person booted out in the debating team in Oxford University’s history.  Gawd, what an insult to Dr Philip Nitschke

What the standing room only crowd indicated to me was the growing sense of awareness that people should not and could not rely on their doctor necessarily from the ultimate relief of pain.

Dr Nitschke went through the requirements under the Law of suicide and that we must not assist people to die unless we’re prepared in Victoria to go to jail for perhaps 10 or 12 years.   He wanted members to be very clear about the ramifications of breaking the law.   He advised us that it is very sensible to have your end of life choices clearly stated in places readily seen……The moral was to Plan Now while still physically and mentally capable.   Do not beg someone to ‘help you die’ and then leave a minefield of legal disasters for those you leave behind.

I couldn’t say that I believed Dr Nitschke was happy and relaxed because my impression of him was the opposite.   I felt that ‘everyone’ wanted a piece of him and he had so very little time to rest us during a four hour session including an end of year get together.   The food was plentiful and provided by Exit members themselves.

Lindy Boyd was run off her feet but remained her happy, cheerful self almost to the end, until the impatience of members wanting ‘instant’ answers became a little overwhelming….Although we were all over 55, the rudeness of some members was embarrassing to me.   As Lindy said, some members had travelled hundred of klm from country towns to attend the Workshop and had a right to ask their questions and be listened to with respect.

Philip answers dozens of questions including one about organ donations.  Apparently the organs of a person known to have committed suicide will not be harvested for transplant.   (I believe there is no medical reason for this, but perhaps it has to do with the feelings of those receiving their gift of life, learning of the suicide.)

It was explained that simply placing a plastic bag over one’s head is a terrible way to die and that some medications also left the body in a mess.   To some extent the information provided was about suicide prevention, which is always a good thing when you’re not sure what you’re doing.

I had a little chuckle as occasionally someone would say “what’s your name, the face seems to be familiar’ and knowing how hopeless I am with names I didn’t think that would help them a great deal…Obviously it was the documentary “Do Not Resuscitate” they were trying to remember.

I was so glad I hadn’t Judy Bayliss along at the Meeting as it was quite a full day and parking was difficult.  I couldn’t imagine me pushing Judy’s wheelchair up the slopes of Malvern and the car was parked a distance away from the venue.  I would have needed a chair myself!